HIDING MYSELF IN YOU

Psalm 143:9  "Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, for I hide myself in you."

So happy I was to get home, Lord, home to You, in this sanctuary You have made for me.  Just to climb up on Your lap and tell you about my day.  I would never think of myself as intimidating, but evidently I make people nervous.  Father, show me; Holy Spirit, awake me to this if it is indeed true.  I only want to please my Lord, I do not want to do anything that would cause anyone to doubt my love for You, doubt my love for them.

Under the guise of just doing my job, am I doing anything that is not of You, my Lord?  Can it be that I let anything ugly rise up in me, pride perhaps, loftiness?  Father, please let it not be so and if Your Sweet Spirit finds this in me, please cut it off the vine, cut off that part of me that is offensive to You, to Your work in me.  I know my job, Father and I know I must train.  Training is not always easy, and neither is learning.  I know how long it is taking me to learn Your precious ways, Your path for me has taken me longer than I would like, for I go around some mountains time after time before I cross over them, but You remain patient with me, loving with me.  This is the attitude I want to have, to continue to have when I am training.  Patient, understanding, gentle direction.  But also there comes a time when I have to be firm, as You, my God have had to be firm with me, with correction, with redirection.  I think that is the problem, sometimes, Father, when I try to be nice and gentle, it is taken for weakness and then I become disregarded as to the role I have.  Yes, my Lord God, I see You smiling now.  I always wonder why I sit and these things begin to pour out of me, why I am heading in this direction or that one, and then You begin to smile; I can feel You smiling in my spirit; and You begin to tell me the basis for this Word.

You are so often taken for granted, my Lord.  Because You love us, because You tell us again and again how very much we are loved, how You treasure us, so often Your children take advantage of that love, and think of it as a weakness, disregarding Your Holiness, Your Majesty.  Just going about their way, thinking what's the harm, what difference does it make if things are done as You directed, as long as the end result is the same.  Compliance.  Just as in my work, things are done to be in compliance with the law; You direct our steps to be in compliance with Your Word, Your law.  The fact that You gently lead us, give us a will of our own, does not negate Who You are; Your complete Authority, You are God, the Great I Am.  When the steps of Your children drift, when You gently try to draw them back, and they keep going their way; then You must be firm, You must correct them.  If they get upset, or hurt, they just have to pout a while.  I see, Father, I still must be firm, give correction and let them pout or be upset.  As You know Your children will return to You given time to consider their mistakes, given time to see the lesson You were teaching them, they return to Your precious love that has never changed, never lessened.  And my trainees, will also see their mistakes, left to think on their own, and return to their training knowing that I was only giving them the direction they needed to do the best work possible.  As Your children, upon return, see that You only want the very best for them, the very best.

This is so good, my Lord.  Sitting in Your lap, letting You take away the unsettling feeling of defeat, of what the enemy tried to make as a failure on my part, and You take the time to use it to teach me, to show a parellel to Your kingdom, to Your children.  I love You so much.  I cannot do this without Your guidance my Lord, without Your love and grace.  Precious Lord, You are everything to me; my life.

This 29th day of September, 2011, do You mind if I just sit here a while longer, just drawing strength from You, just loving the way You refresh my spirit as I sit with You.  So happy, so blessed, sitting in Your presence, loving You.