Psalm 65:4 "Blessed is the man You choose, and cause to approach You, that he may dwell in Your courts, we shall be satisfied with the goodness of Your house, of Your holy temple."
I know you are smiling at me tonight Lord, in amusement. I am always trying to put thoughts in Your mind instead of remembering that Your thoughts are not mine, Your thoughts are holy, while mine are worldly, no matter how hard I try, they still are worldly compared to Your beautiful, holy thoughts.
Here I was today, thinking about how tired You must get, listening to all You hear each day, seeing what goes on here, having Your children go on and on about stuff in ways that are disappointing to You. I felt Your heart today, again, Lord, grieving as Your children carried on and on about the death of this man who had done such atrocities, such acts against Americans, against Your children. It was difficult as I watched also, but I felt how You watched in dismay that they, once again, were missing it. It is the act of sin, not the sinner, no matter who it is. All on earth are Your children, regardless of whether they claim You or not. If that were not so, then it would make other truths of Your Word not so also. Just because they do not claim You as their Father, does not make them any less Yours. The fact that they do not call You their God only deepens the rejection for You. We, Your children that love You, are to pray for them, and treat them as we would any other sinner. I know this will not be received well, Lord. Do you know I will be criticised? As I sit here wanting to cry, at Your having me write this. I really thought we were going to talk about how I would like it if You just stepped off the world for a while, and rested in a quiet place where there was no one wanting You to do something, change something, just for a short while. Just so I could see You have a few moments of peace and quiet.
Yes, Father, I do understand. You are telling me that You chose to have Your children call on you day and night. That is it your desire to do for us, Your great love for us causes You to want to hear our voices calling out to You. You made us to come to You. We were created to be Your children, to be the little ones that would run to You whenever we get hurt or get in trouble, no matter the cause, but knowing we could run to You for healing, for protection, for advice. I just get so distressed when I feel You grieve at our behavior. I want so for You to be pleased with us, Your kids. I just love You so, my Lord, I love You so. I want to be pleasing in Your sight, and I want my brothers and sisters to come along side of me to give You pleasure also. I know they want this also. We just are so much of our environment, sometimes it is easy to get swept up in the fray of things, sometimes forgetting who we are, what we are to be in You. Forgive me Lord, forgive us.
We are never to judge, no matter what. I just kept thinking today of how these people, these that know of You, but refuse to accept You as their Lord and Savior, as their God, as their Father, how sad they were. And it is not only one set of people, there are many who know of You, but do not know You. They are blinded by their upbringing, their traditions, their own volition, their own choices. How very sad, the day they leave this life, to find that they were so wrong, so foolish, too late. To see You, my beautiful, glorious Lord and know they were wrong, and know at the same time they will never get to be with You, that they will be cast into the lake of fire for eternity. I know Father, that grieves You any time one of Your children, however cruel, however evil, is destined to that lake, to forever be in a state of torment for eternity, that one more soul was lost. Pleading for time, for a do-over, and it is too late. My God, my God, I will never stop trying to tell others of Your great love and forgiveness. My Lord, I want to do whatever I can go see that Your heart does not have to grieve over the loss of any of Your children, no matter how evil they are, I will pray, I will proclaim Your glory to them. I will, my Lord, I will.
Here we are again, My Lord. Once again, I began this only to find that You moved it to Your will, not mine. I know You know the reaction this will probably take. Crossed my mind not to post it, but I cannot let myself not do Your will for I will grieve You in doing so. The enemy is having a field day right now with me over posting this, but post it I will, for You did not give me this to keep it hidden. You told me that whatever You had me do, You would make it right, You would see that it was accepted. So, my Father, I am walking in what You tell me to do, trusting, giving myself to You. If it is not accepted, if I am to be criticised, I will walk through this also, as I will walk through whatever I must to do Your will, to abide in You, to give myself completely for Your use. Not my will ever, Lord, but Yours. I know no matter what I walk through, You will be walking beside me, holding my hand, loving me.
But, my precious Father, should You desire to have a short time out, just a short one, where You will find peace (it is perfect, as You made it so), find contentment (as only in You there can be), and find a dwelling that is so longing for You to come in and stay a while (forever), I know just the place for You. Here, my Lord, here in my heart. And if You want I will not tell anyone You are here.....just for a while....just for a restful reprieve....my heart's delight.
This 2nd day of May, 2011, I am longing for time out with You, my Lord. I love You so much, I give You all my worship, all glory and honor is due just You my Lord. You are so holy, so holy, and You are my God.
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