Philippians 3:10-11 (Message) "I gave up all that inferior stuff so I could know Christ personally, experience his resurrection power, be a partner in his suffering, and go all the way with hinm to death itself. If there was any way to get in on the resurrection from the dead, I wanted to do it."
What is there about the worldly aspects of life that have people so confused about the Lord, about His love for all? There is black and there is white. Where the Lord is, there is no grey. It is one or the other. I have found that in order to truly seek after my Lord, I had to make a choice. In the beginning it was not easy, as I was concerned about stuff. How foolish I find it now, that I felt that way. It had to go. It was not important. Now I wonder why I ever bothered with it at all.
I went to the movies yesterday afternoon. Saw Pirates of the Carribean (new one). Jack Sparrow had not changed, the movie was okay, but halfway through it I found myself crying. The movie is not overly sad, as this movie goes, but my eyes were running with tears. My spirit was crying and as I thought to myself, "what is it Lord, that I cannot enjoy a movie? Is there something wrong with me?" There is nothing wrong with me, and there is nothing wrong with going to a movie. I would have a problem with a movie with a lot of language or explicitity in it; just can't do that. But there is nothing wrong with enjoying movies. And I am sure I will again. But at this time, now, I found my spirit drawing me spiritually back to my Lord.
So much of my time at home, at work, in my car, everywhere is spent worshiping the Lord. At work, it is more mentally and spiritually than actually out loud, but there is worship and prayer going up constantly. I believe that where I am right now in my walk with the Lord, I want so much to access His throne room, to draw His presence to me, to capture His presence.....holding Him here with me as long as possible, that I find it hard to do anything that takes me away from the Word and from worshiping my God.
As I pursue the presence of the Lord, it takes me on a different level. There is no longer the level of a short prayer, a little worship and going into the presence of the Lord. At times, it is just that simple. But I believe to totally capture His presence, you must go deeper than that. I have begun to study, study and study some more the Word of my God. I want to know exactly what He is saying to me, personally, in these scriptures. There is a personal message for each of us that are seeking the Lord to be found in the scriptures of His Holy Word. The Lord has told me He has a plan for me, for my life and I know I need to search His Word for access to that plan, for understanding of the plan, what He has and what He wants me to do. There is a plan for each of us, carefully detailed in His Word. When you study the Word and come across the plan that is designed for you specifically, the Holy Spirit will quicken your spirit and heart and let you know you have begun to find the words that pertain to you personally.
So I am seeking the Lord's will for me; running after Him without hesitation, without fear, without reservation. I know there is nothing to fear in my Lord, His will for my life will contain a perfect plan for the beginning, the working of the plan, and the end of it, the end of it being enthroned with Him in eternal glory in Heaven. I cannot let anything hinder me from giving Him all of me, everything that is in me, nothing held back. I intent, fully intent to capture His presence, to hold Him to me for as long as I can. I know that the more I pour into my pursuit of Him, the more that I gather His attention to me, the more I please Him, the more He will desire to spend time with me. If I put all my desire into Him, He will desire me as well. As I devote more and more of my time to studying His Word, to worshiping Him with all my heart and spirit, and to prayer, lifting up my words to Him, my petitions; as I glorify Him, give Him the praise He is so due, loving on Him, reaching up, desiring to touch His face, to see His face.....when He sees that I am completely His, then He will be completely mine....I will have captured His presence....my heart's desire.
This 30th day of May, 2011, my spirit has me sitting at the feet of my beautiful, wonderful, Lord; singing songs of worship, telling Him of my love, totally captivated in the presence of my King. I in Him and He in me.
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